CW: This post discusses suicide and suicide-related topics.
In case you didn’t know, September is Suicide Prevention Awareness Month in the United States. Every year, I do my best to use this month as an opportunity to share information, statistics and resources related to suicide prevention. Suicide is not only an extremely serious topic, but a public health issue. We can’t continue to ignore this topic, as hard as it may be to talk about. Suicide prevention means speaking up, sharing our stories, and reminding others that they are not alone.
One aspect of mental health that I think is fascinating is the idea of high-functioning mental illness. I’ve written posts about high-functioning anxiety and high-functioning depression and even though I’ve learned a lot about both over the years, there is still so much to learn. Lately, I’ve thought a lot about how my brain works when I’m experiencing high-functioning anxiety – the way I race to get things done, the pressure I put on myself to finish things by the arbitrary (often unrealistic) deadlines I’ve set. Today, I want to reflect on why it can sometimes be challenging to race from one thing to another all the time.
As someone who lives with anxiety, my brain often feels like it’s moving a million miles per hour. I think we all feel this way at one time or another; we have so many things to do, and it doesn’t seem like there’s enough time to do it all. I’ve noticed the themes of relaxing and slowing down on my posts in recent months, and I think that’s a response to my current state of being. I always deal with the challenge of a busy mind from time to time but lately, I feel like it’s a daily struggle. Why is my brain trying to do everything, everywhere, all at once? And what can I do about it?
There are many new buzzwords in the world of mental health, and one of the ones I’ve thought a lot about is the idea of self-awareness. In the past few years, self-awareness is brought up more and more in regards to living a mentally healthy life. Though it seems like a simple concept, my journey with self-awareness has been anything but simple. I used to be under the impression that once I improved my self-awareness, my anxiety and depression would go away. In today’s post, I’d like to share why I was wrong, and how I plan to fix it.
Over the years, I’ve learned a number of words, phrases and definitions that have helped me understand my own mental health. Some of these are connected to mental illness or medicine, while others are connected to mental wellness. In this recurring series, I break down some of the mental health terms I’ve learned over the years. Today, I’ll be breaking down thought spirals: what they are, what they look like and what we can do about them.
What is a Thought Spiral?
There are many other names it goes by (anxiety spiral, downward spiral, spiraling thoughts) but simply put, a thought spiral is a series of thoughts that become increasingly overwhelming as a person gets stuck on them. They are typically linked to anxiety and anxious thoughts, but thought spirals can also exist when people are experiencing depression or other mental illness.
Another similar term (or perspective to think about this term) are the cognitive distortions catastrophic thinking and magnification. Both of these cognitive distortions can happen when a person’s thoughts have been spiraling out of control. Whether they are becoming increasingly overwhelming or unrealistic, our thoughts can spiral out of control and lead us into believing things that are simply untrue. When thoughts turn from rational to irrational, it’s time to take a look at what’s happening in our brain.
What Does a Thought Spiral Look Like?
One of the tricky things about thought spirals (at least for me) is how they can sneak up on us. Sometimes our thoughts will lay dormant, not bothering us at all. But then an intrusive or negative thought could enter our brains and if we’re unwilling or unable to acknowledge it, it gets stuck in our head. Before you know it, one thought has piled on another, and your thoughts are spiraling in a much more negative or overwhelming direction than you’d anticipated.
As someone who has to be aware of thought spirals on a daily basis, I’ve gained a better sense of when I’m susceptible to thought spirals. Simply put, there are just some roads of thinking I don’t need to go down because I know what could happen. That doesn’t mean I’m always successful, but that bit of awareness has helped my mental wellness in ways that are invaluable. Thought spirals have the same method, but the unique properties of it – what those thoughts are, and how they’re triggered – will look different for everyone.
What Can We Do About It?
In my opinion, the most important thing we can do when it comes to this topic is to be as open and honest as we can. I think that all of us should be aware of thought spirals because they can happen to anyone. Sometimes I feel like my anxiety or depression might make me more susceptible to thought spirals. But also, anyone can land in a situation where they aren’t thinking as clearly as usual.
Recognizing a thought spiral isn’t always easy, but awareness is the first step. If you notice when your thoughts are getting increasingly overwhelming, name it and acknowledge it. When I can name or define something about my mental health, the challenge to overcome that obstacle eases. Be on the lookout for an upcoming post about other tips and techniques for dealing with thought spirals but in the meantime, I hope that awareness is helpful!
For a long time, I experienced thought spirals but never knew what they were. Now I want to hear from you! Have you heard of thought spirals, or do you know them by another name? What is/was your experience with them? Let me know in the comments!
The more experience I’ve gained on my mental health journey, the better I’ve gotten at recognizing my depression and the reasons behind it. That being said, depression can still be tricky. There are times where I feel like I know exactly why I feel depressed; other times, it’s like a feeling or emotion comes out of nowhere. The wintertime is actually one of the trickiest times to recognize my feelings. Is it just a time of seasonal sadness, or is it something I need to look into further?
Living with Generalized Anxiety Disorder has taught me so many things about myself. I’ve learned what some of my tendencies are, as well as what habits I fall into when it comes to coping mechanisms. I’ve learned about my triggers, what overstimulates me and what makes me anxious. But over the past few years, I’ve started focusing on other things connected to my anxiety. My GAD has always impacted my physical health, but it wasn’t something I often reflected on. Like other mental health disorders, anxiety can affect our physical health. Here’s how it impacts mine!
This post comes on a heels of a similar post I wrote recently called “I Am Not My Depression” (you can check it out here!). A big part of my mental health journey is the way I’ve noticed that language has built up the stigma surrounding mental health, which means I’m constantly trying to find ways to break down that stigma. And just like in my recent post, I want to share why instead of saying that I’m more than my anxiety, I explicitly try to reinforce the notion that I am not my anxiety – and here’s why.
Every so often, I deal with situations or moments that I’ve come to recognize as “winding myself up.” I know that it’s a pretty well-known phrase and this happens to a lot of people, but I wanted to talk about my experience with getting wound up because I think it’s a unique insight into what it’s like to experience anxiety. Even though it can be extremely easy to get myself wound up, it’s much, much harder for me to calm myself down in a similar fashion. So today I ask – why is it so much harder to get wound up than to settle down?
Sometimes, anxiety is like an itch you can’t scratch. You know it’s there – you can sense it, feel it, even acknowledge it if you’re able – but you feel helpless to do anything about it. I’ve experienced this feeling a few times here and there during the past week, which is what I want to talk about today.
My Brain's Not Broken 